The Poll Results are IN!!!! (and musical ravings)

First of all the most exciting aspect of the poll results are the fact that no one voted at all! I interpret this as meaning that all of the listed composers are equally esteemed by the hoards of blogees out there. Or it could connect to the fact that the POLL WILL NOT WORK! This would also explain the strange fact that even the creator of this blog didn't vote.

I will take the opportunity now to tell you that I am not the actual creator of this blog, and also introduce OUR BIG CONTEST!! If you can guess the identity of the extremely famous and powerful person I am ghost writing this blog for, you will win the opportunity to vote in the next poll. HAH! Actually I will allow you to post on this blog, pending corporate approval.

Here is a clue as to the identity of the the blogger behind the scenes: Hunting Accident.

When the result are tallied, in the event of a tie, the prize reverts to me. All participants will receive the absence of a lovely parting gift, tastefully decorated.

Since the last pot was about classical music, thought that I would make this one about Egyptology. No actually that will be later; this one will be about "popular" music.

When I was very young, back in the Permian, I didn't like music at all. The first record that I had was Paul Revere and the Raiders, the one that contained "Cherokee People". So proud to live. So proud to die. I guess I could still listen to it, but it really didn't age very well. I would like to hear the song "The Turkey". My grandmother, who had bought me the album said: " It sounds like they are all on dope" Not the higher quality stuff either, must have been laced with Mercury... chunks of the planet that is...

The next thing I bought was "Superstition", by Stevie Wonder. I used to play this on a record player that looked like it had been stolen from the Victrola dog. Great sound, it was already scratchy when it was still brand new. I still like that song, but it seems like Stevie Wonder released alot of stuff that is "appreciated" or "recognized" but not really enjoyed. Kind of like all the garbage Springsteen released from bout Nebraska on. "ol John Henry, he a comin' up the drive.." what the crumbs? I picture Springsteen "settin' " on a stool, drunk, toothless, grinning, a- wearing a red kerchief, and banjoing himself into another dimension. To be fair, the main reason he upsets me so is that I KNOW he can do much better- I still love "Dampness on the Edge of Town", and everything that preceded it. Has he done a moving song like "Candy's Room" since then? Or a song with the fun word play like "Blinded by the Light"? No way. I am sure he can... so why is he inflicting this pap on us? "

The fever is receding.

Anyway back to the chronology of my interest in pop music. There were some lean years there, where I didn't add any albums, but I did become a big fan of listening to hit songs on my orange pocket radio. These were fun- they cost about 1 dollar, and had one tiny scratchy speaker. I remember enjoying stuff like "Seasons in the Sun", "Willie won't go home" " Me and Mrs Jones" "I don't like Spiders and Snakes" "She ain't mine anymore" and the ilk while whiling away the hours comparing Johnson Smith to Edmund Scientific.

Along with the massive sea of hormones, arrived The Beatles. I liked their music alot, and I guess secretly thought that the girls loved them the most (even though this was now 1979 and the Beatles were already a thing of the past, and John Lennon had about a year to go) and hoped that my interest in them would somehow transform me into a high school Adonis. It didn't work very well.

After the Beatles, I became interested in the other British Invasion bands: the Stones, The Kinks, The Who; and then later The Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, and the The Led Zepellin. I developed a revulsion towards the university, and an attraction towards freedom. I even managed to fall in love somehow, or at least to delude some poor girl into thinking that she cared about me. It was a fanciful, grand, carefree time of listening to loud music and criticizing the government.

The eighties music developed at this time, seemingly to foment my rebellion. I listened to Silly Idol Flock of Hairstyles, U2, REM and all the others who were some kind of alchemical soul mates. But all bad things must come to an end, and this one did too. I had to decide on a "career" This began a nauseating cycle that still hasn't seen the light at the end of the chunnel. I did start teaching at a langauge school (which was fun) and fogged the wool over my eyes to convince myself that making 23 cents per year after taxes constituted the monetary rewards of a career...all the while declaring bankruptcy on a weekly basis and trying to find new credit cards with a limit over 2 dollars...

The music of the nineties provided a great backdrop for this time. While the stuff of the eighties suggested that anyone could start their own band, say what they wanted to say, especially politically, and expand the limits of creativity, that of the nineties hinted that nothing was possible, but you could form a band and scream a nihistic message at high volumes, and make alot of money doing it. I had mixed feelings about this message.. sometimes I thought it was negativity overkill, and other times I thought they were right...

And finally in the post modern catastrophy we are actually living through now, music is nothing but a business, a very evil one, with people who look "good", have nothing to say, and are exlusively out to line their own pockets.. some of these characters are the bloated remnants of the popular 80s and nineties bands... they will never get a dime out of me at least..

An Unlimted Supply
And here's the reason why
I tell you it was all a frame
They only did it cos of fame
Who?
EMI
EMI...

I do not need the pressure
Or consent of useless fools

Hello EMI!

GOOD BYE! A AND M.... (fart)

and a few trademarked band names I am selling at a bargain rate (All copyrighted)

The Enemanigmas
Hairlords
Bananabrides
Mass Extinction
Asteroid
Pretentors
Swimbladder
Crazy Ear
The Ingrown Follicles
Missle Tunnel Tingles
Hatshepsut
Armageddon Tones
Spoiled Rotten Middle Class Glue Victims
Make Mommy Love Me
Shadowdoor
Paste
A Chemical Solution
Synapsense
Candy Crime
Fictional Particles
Soul Stretchers
Broom Ponderers
Tongue
ExtraorinaryLife Fluid Embezzlers
We are really mean and tough, because we swear alot, even though we are pretty skinny, wear over-sized fashionable clothes, and are of sub-standard height. We invented music, sex and killing people. We play great, even though we have no musical ability known to man. We are very clever because we talk about all the girls and money we have. Please fear us. ( would take a big t-shirt I guess)

and the video du jour...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=G7FdJajqxmU

Guten Tag!

The NEXT Post

Well I have been told that dead blogs are rife with apologies for not posting often enough, so I will refuse to do so. So there. I seem to be a little out of synch today, as the moon is now in Taurus, but I am listening to Haydn. Oh well classical music is fairly "Taurus" itself, isn't it. At any rate, I have donned my breeches and applied my powdered wig, and am rarin' to go.

I am going to try to make this blog, and perhaps its soon to affixed website, the happiest possible cyber place on Earth for me, nay- for the entirety of Creation. Even though it may in fact at times look a little journalesque, this is a necessary part of the whole phenomenon known as "blog". Think of it this way: in 1666 it was called Samuel Pepys diary, and now it is considered a literary masterpiece, ( Sir Butthead:" He said masterpiece hehehhheheehheh.. Sir Beavis yeh. hehhehmmhmhmm. I don't get it." ) even though the diary includes a neat catalogue of romantic encounters the author had with himself. At least there will be none of that here: I am no romantic.

Ah, what the Hades, this one will be about classical music, and my opinons about it, which shall stand as commandments into the upcoming millenia.

I first became interested in classical music (that is WESTERN classical music- if you think this connects to country/western, you might be on the wrong page- try http://www.beersoakedbillysaul.com/). By the byway, I love eastern music, just that I will whine about that at a later date. Man, is that sentence over yet? What a grammatical abomination (tm) this is! I will go ahead, as the sentence may not end until some time next week.

Strangly enough.

I played some classical music in the concert band from 7th to 12th grade, but maybe "played' is no the right word. "Mutilated" is the right word. I couldn't really get a sense of how fantastic some of this music was, and also we never played anything challenging, like Beethoven's 7th symphony or whatever. We needed to lie down for weeks after "Forward".

I was aware that my mother had a small collection of classical records, although she almost never played them. She usually waited til we kids were out of the house so we wouldn't start snickering at whatever she had on. I do remember coming home early once and catching her in the act of listening to Beethoven. I really loved this music, and we talked about it. I think this was in high school. I was very surprised to find out that I really liked some music my mother liked, after having already embarked on a career of listening to music that threatened everything that she held sacred. So there I was, dazed, with decomposing Beatles records in hand, wondering where to go from there.

The classical thing faded for a bit as I was distracted by things like college, girls who would never give me the time of day in a post-apocalyptic nightmare world, an especially crummy period in new pop music, a growing interest in The Kinks, and most importantly: Pizza. This was not to last long- I was rescued from this stupefication by three important events: The election of Ronald " Well, where is my diaper, Mommy" Reagan, the assassination of John Lennon and the advent of New Wave. I went on a rollercoaster ride of a life, which I will go into somewhat in later blogs, but one of the more "boring" results of this was buying cheap classical records. Bach could be had for a buck, Mozart for a mere pittance. I couldn't believe this. A rare Frank Zappa album could set you back a small fortune, but this amazing, wonderful, timeless music was going for bird seed.

So I spent so much of my time listening to this great music. In my car I had Mozart's Jupiter Symphony, Hadyn' s "Surprise" and "Clock", as well as "Never Mind the Bullocks" of course. Times of high hilarity.

To male a drab story even duller, after years of learning about classical music, the " favs" remain more or less the same. Beethoven is my favorite, almost everything that he wrote. Hadyn is a close second- he is an originator, and his music is filled with such direct life. I like some of Mozart, but am not always in the mood. Of course all of these character could be jokers: Beethoven in at the end of the third movement of the 7th symphony for example, but Mozart is sometimes too consistently playful for my tastes. What an ingrate I am- even the greats get criticized. I love Bach and Vivaldi, but sometimes I am not in the mood for the structure of Baroque music. Of the romantics, Chopin is the only one that I regularly like to hear. His waltzes are some of the best, most original music of any kind I think- they sound like small symphonies for piano. Vagner- nah. Liszt-nope Berlioz- nuh uh. These guys lose too much structure in my opinion and I just don't enjoy listening to them, they get on my nerves. Seems like there is too much "art" in their compositions, and not enough "soul" of course this crime can be committed in all forms of music, but it especially ruins classical I think. I love passages of Tchaikovsky, but listening to the entirety of any of his music causes me the same trouble.

My God, how serious this post is! I will subject myself to Ren and Stimpy viewing Clockwork Orange style until I collapse at depth and allow a sense of humor to enter my life again.

I will end this with a few things:

1) Please take part in my Classical Music Poll!
2) Enjoy the Video of the Moment (link below)
3) Publishers: I have all kinds of great manuscript around the house...insulating, wrapping fish, and setting my hamster's fracture.. if you can help me out, please do! I plan to showcase some already completed stuff here in the future.

The Video:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxM9UG0nuUI&feature=related

And a musical surprise:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECmvesH3wqk (careful of volume!)

Blog Blog Blog... Blog is all you need...

Well, it has finally happened. I have broken down and gotten myself a blog, even while disliking the term, and fully realizing that it is more or less a pseudonym for low-cal website. I have to see how well my cheapness can flourish and outdo itself. If I get the gumption at some point, I may add all kinds of loot to this contraption. We will see. If there is tremendous public outcry to my neglecting this creation, I may relent and add my website for example. Only time will smell. But first a little about you. Very little, as I know nothing about you, other than the fact that you are an underemployed time-squanderer like myself. Isn't it great? What is this world coming to btw? What about them wars? Them unnatural disasters? If you are game, I can use astrology to explain them. Otherwise, it must be all God's fault as usual... for those of you wondering who I am, please refer to the biographical information that will exist at some point in the future. Since it seems impossible to find even tattered images for free on the Internut (tm), I think we will all have to use our imaginations for the time being. I wouldn't want to accidently profit millions from the use of some out-of-focus image from someone's girl scout camera. When I buy some virtual crayons, I will render some images in the worst possible way. What is it like here, you reprimand? Well I took hot advatage of the land giveaway going on in antartica, and can tell you that it is more of a cozy bargain than one might imagine. The only real drawback, other than being periodically gored by an elephant seal, or crazed geologist, is that in place of rent I have to climb down long narrow tubes to manually collect core samples once a month. A small price to pay for infamy though...Final note for now: don't let 'em fool you, the US economy is piping hot! Unemployment has been eliminated. Of course benefits, fulltime jobs, even conventional part time jobs are a thing of antiquity. Now, however, the govrnment is offering packages of subatomic "microjobs" each pouch contains about a billion tiny jobs. Each job itself is next to effortless, but when they are all put together you can work up quite a sweat. They pay extremely well, the only drawback being that they pay in coin per job, and you won't be able to to cart all the pennies home to your piggy bank! Oh well... by the time you get your microsalary organized there will be a new regime. Maybe they will help us out.

Here is the video of the arbitrary time period:

Hare Krishna!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=4JdmuPKgNVI