A Chump Intermission

All due pardons begged, as the illustrious Chump (tm) is touring the globe, sipping yachted champagne topped with lemon lime Perrier spritzer as the peasants cringe, moan and croon at his lotus nonfeet. He will return shortly for the next installment in his ludicrous adventures, have no fear. For now you will have to settle for the unillustrious Me (public domain) coming at you with feathered fists of fury, to rouse you from your matter -soaked complacency.

I really should have entitled this entry "practicality" because that is what it is all about. A first observation is that people who have succeeded in the most absurdly impractical, at least from a conventional point of view, ways then can lean back in their ruby-encrusted drawing rooms and intone " oh dread, how one must not hatch or hazard the impracticable. especially and for etcetera under the present economico-politico circumstances. Why when I was the merest of tadpoles, back there in my daddy's drawer.Hrrmph."

Well for those of you at all even remotely interested, I have tried both the practical and the impractical, and found them both utterly lacking. What you can never realize is the real intention behind this. Everyone without exception is locked in. There is no such thing as manifesting your own reality- it is possible to a certain extent, depending on the person, to modify your perception of reality, but the analogy of time being a river is a very apt one. The only way to make any important permanent changes is to dam the thing. When a boat is swept away by a river, obviously everyone tries to survive, but only some do. And the river is and imperfect analogy, like all analogies. After the happy Hollywood ending of our "hero" drying out on the shore, a bear lovingly disembowels him and they all die happily ever after. In the sequel the bear dies of bird flu.

Am I a negative person? I think that that idea implies that I am unrealistic. After having weathered a relationship with a sexy succubus, I am now all growed up in many respects, and am a REALIST. Will this make me popular? yes, if I also date Paris Hilton and accessorize my wardrobe. " I can tell you accessorize, by the look that's in your eyes" Sorry Ray. Finally this writing is returning somewhat to the honesty that it showed in the 80s... wrong?, I dunno, annoying? That isn't the point. This is ME. All warts and only warts, but if you don't like it, you can switch solar systems. Yes I suck, and I am wrong and so on and so on.... but at least I am not someone else, so it could be worse. This is my Blastic Ono Band, so be forewarned. Only I am not addicted to a love relationship.

Think of the Dinosaurs. I love them, because they are animals, and I love all animals, except for human beings. But all animals suffer, and when people are actually willing to admit that religion or not, philosophy, cutesy or not, they have NO IDEA about why we are here, and what happens after death. I can love them too. Prove the loving God to me. I dare you. Let's say for instance, that you lead a remarkable capitalist existence ( or an incredible socialist/totalitarina/ monarchian/billgatesian.. doesn't matter). Your health is beaming. Your spouse is shining. You live in San Diego. Your teeth are bright, and your coat glossy. You have your distemper vaccination. Very good. Rather than having you marauded by vampire hamsters in your sleep, or knocked by lightening into a tornado on the railroad tracks in the Grand Canyon, you can continue living. The same thing "God" did in 1999 to all of us. You and your spouse get wrinkly and saggy, so you replace you bodies with clones of Farrah Fawcett and Warren Beatty. Everything is sehr wunderbar, until about the impossible year 5000, when you turn to her in your crumbling underground shelter and say," Darling, your replacement body is starting to stink, and if I have to watch another repeat of Green Acres, I will commit seppuku with my own stubby Warren Beatty fingers." She will lovingly grimace at you, and then produce the grape flavored cyanide beverage that was saved for just such an occasion. You then culminate your perfect life in unspeakable agony. Even at best, nothingness was all you could hope for.

I think there is an evil god in charge of this garbage. Sheit(tm) is powerful and very intelligent, but evil otherwise Sheit(tm) would instantaneously whisk us away to Sheit's hysterically perfect Xanadu in the clouds, come to think of it, being omniscientish, Sheit should have kept us there.

There you have it the perfectly practical humanitarian exercise of coating others with the unvarnished truth.

I still love Dinosaurs.


Have a hot dog with mustard, and coat your ears with this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQcGzSoeZQw

well it is becoming a dilapidated kind of VH1, but who cares..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQyClNEfncg

And to round out your evening
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LjsOoO0VdM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LjsOoO0VdM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mwD4hqJxqM
oh. I found it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zc3KXwd8ZWQ&feature=related
I promise this the last one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YN7b4h21nxc
Maybe I should run for public office.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uPMYkITzxn0&feature=related
And a note to "god"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wiyrFSSG5_g&feature=related
Man the above song is great..And Ray is rapping! In 1968. Of course Dylan and Jagger had too... and I am sure it can be traced further back.I think this song peaked at number negative infinity on the US charts. Buy all Kinks albums through " Give The Silmos What they Want". Do it now, that is a Kommandment.